“Arthur, when I told you that I had one gay dream about Balan, it was supposed to be confidential!” whined Merlin, grasping at his beard. “Now everyone in Camelot is going to think that I have the hots for him and no one in the wizarding community is going to respect me!”
“Well,” Arthur replied. “You’re gay, you’re gay! You’re here, you’re gay, get used to it!”
Please do keep this confidential, but as Nigel Diapers’s maid, I can assure you that he and Mrs. Diapers aren’t living in the Camelot that the media (that the Neveryouminds™ conglomerate has in its back pocket) would have you believe. It’s more of a Hesmokescrackandshepeesherpantsalot.