It was speed date night again, and as Mariam’s eyes swept the room, all she could see where foibles and loser schmucks. Her eyes fell suddenly upon a short gentleman, reading Twilight: Breaking Dawn and checking his beeper–a true winner, a man worthy of her heart. As she approached, he straightened up and said, “Good evening. My name is Nigel Diapers. Would you care to join me for a cup of tea?” It wasn’t until after they were married that Mariam realized he’d been wearing a diaper instead of pants.

–Cindy Capleton

Frankie was a great guy for the most part but Winifred had to dump him for his single foible: indiscriminately paging her beeper 911 with no regard to his messages’ actual level of urgency.
-Gladys Potter

It was easy for PeePee to overlook most of her new husband’s foibles. Only one bad habit got under her skin, and that was his attempt to be funny by hiding her beeper up his butt.
–Lady Schwartz

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