Cindy Capleton was less than cordial after a stranger at the coffee shop murmured snidely, “That’s a lot of carbs,” when she ordered two coffees and two guava pastries. After storming back into the car, she handed Sir Pumpkin Longshanks his coffee and pastry and made a simple requisition: “Drive slow past the coffee shop so I can throw this bottle of water at this assclown.”
Steve could have been a little more cordial about Phil’s requisition instead of immediately bitchslap him. After all, Phil only wondered aloud if Steve could perhaps be a touch quieter and less selfish during their frequent cuddle parties, and maybe also perhaps wrap his tiny brain around the idea that taking your weiner out is not exactly the ice breaker Steve might think it is.
Having grown tired of her endless requisitions, Ned through the box of cherry cordials, which she demanded just moments ago, into the ugly mug of the queen herself, Lady Mendl of Roanoke.