Once Mr. Diapers climbed to the top of the garbage heap at the town dump, built himself a trash fort and used a cardboard toilet paper tube telescope with which to reconnoiter the land. Only after his bizarre but informative phone call afterwards to the local radio station did anyone realize he was on PCP and thought he was a world famous moon explorer.
We learned much from our mission to reconnoiter the famous backlands of Wrinklearia, the most important observation being the locals’ ritual sacrifice of 10,000 lbs. of black glitter for good crops and prosperity to Wrinklearia’s queen monarch, Shingz.
The Secret Touchings family is planning a reconnoiter mission to Miami, Florida in order to truly understand a day in the life of the famous, the magnificent, the ever-powerful, Sir Pumpkin Longshanks, who celebrates the 20th year of his life today. Likely to be surrounded by well-wishers, loved ones, and B-List celebrities, our perlustrations will undeniably be filled with mirth and orgies. Happy Birthday, Sir Pumpkin Longshanks!
–Cindy Capleton ( that’s Mrs. Sir Pumpkin Longshanks to you!)
Famous for reconnoitering Tooch Nation and no only retrieving all its military secrets but also its fearless leader Tooch herself, Sir PL celebrates his twentieth anniversary of birth, second only to the anniversary of this seemingly impossible feat.