“Listen up, you jerks: if your negligible attitudes do not improve, especially around my closet of caparison, I’m kicking your asses to the curb faster than Pontius Pilate washed his hands on the first Sunday,” OMR drunkenly screamed at his well-behaved Easter guests. “And if I see another drink without a coaster under it on this bookshelf, then I’m taking away your whippets rights!”
Spindly Cindy Capleton, she
bought herself caparisons, be-
cause her horse was super anal
or just gay, they’re negligible.
—Olympian mustang riders
“You caparison yourself with such gusto that one would think the expense of dressing so well is negligible to you,” Phil said to Steve as Steve tied his new ascot. “It is,” Steve replied. “It is.”
Mr. Diapers caparisons himself with embroidered blazers of all colors from the waist up, but wears nothing but a Ne’er You Mind and negligible amount of asshole bleach down below.