Few are aware that as an ephebe freshly out of archeology school Nigel Diapers searched for -and found! – evidence of life on Pluto during a month-long cave dwelling expedition, but he quit after bumping into the same damn stalactite for the third time, as it was a clear sign that the world was not only out to get him, but wanted him to walk the earth in a diaper.
I used to smoke weed with a useless ephebe
who would contemplate caves and stalactites.
Would you ever agree, said he unto me,
to spelunk? I said: I think I might.
-Obese mountain ranger
Is that a stalactite in your pocket or are you just happy to see me, ephebe?