Churlish/congeal

Despite common misconceptions of heroism and cuteness, male dolphins are in fact churlish, hulking creatures, whose boners are often congealed by the slightest of glances from a female of any species.
–Cindy Capleton 

I was heartbroken by Alec Baldwin’s churlish manner when I finally met him, I felt my loins dehydrate to sandpaper and the moisture in my mouth congealed to chunks of disappointment too massive to swallow.
-wrightless smalls

“Come! Let’s gather around the fire to panegyrize our old pal before he turns to detritus and our memories of him congeal into oblivion,” said Mr. Tidbitz, but he couldn’t think of any notable highlights of Dr. Sprinkle’s life, only his myriad failures, including his strange experiment in which he chose to serry seven churlish men with poor posture into a small, climate-controlled room to test whether their being together would make them less grumpy or to stand up straighter.
-Gladys Potter

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