Apodictic/lettuce

“Totally. Dude. Dead serious. Apodictic. The lettuce stood up in the refrigerator, did a dance, and called me a stinker!!” But no matter the fancy words she prefaced it with, Marcus knew that his daughter’s only excuse for not eating the dinner salad he prepared was that she already filled up on Twizzlers.
-Gladys Potter

Harvey could no longer ignore his sneaking suspicions, so he got up at 4AM, crept into the barn with binoculars and a flash camera, and waited. Sure enough, he soon had apodictic evidence that rabbits were ballroom dancing in the lettuce patch as dawn broke. Harvey never told anyone, but instead kept the pictures for blackmail just in case.

~Lady Schwartz

As Nancy Beans began her pickles and lettuce only diet, she pondered the amount of money that would be saved from not buying anything sans pickles and lettuce. She came to the apodictic conclusion that she should be allowed to spend all of that what would be her food money on whatever she fancied–in this case: toile sheet sets, a coconut tree, and a small, hairless cat. 

–Cindy Capleton

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2 Responses to Apodictic/lettuce

  1. wrightless smalls says:

    “Let us in!” shouted the townspeople of Albany. “We have apodictic testimony that Sir Longshanks is in there. He is a known fugitive guilty of breaking the prince williams heart in the biggest scandal of this month of July!”

  2. Velma Creen says:

    A costumed purveyor of apodictic dogma promenades to the altar. A familiar stench emanates from the preceding censer and brings the fearful horde into a submissive, vegetative state. And – it begins:
    “The lord be with you.
    “And also with you.
    “Lettuce, pray.”

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