Sabbatical/onomatopoeia

After taking a brief sabbatical from life, Chester von Peckerstein decided to dedicate his time continuing the work that anthropologist Baron Humbert von Gikkingen had started when he was a junior in high school–perfecting a series of suicide pantomimes and a hybrid version of charades that results in an onomatopoeia-combination of an animal’s name and yelling.

–Cindy Capleton

“Take a sabbatical already, ya old bitch!!!” an angry audience member yelled as he threw a rotten tomato onto the stage at the feet of Nacho, who due to a newly discovered disease called onomatopoeia-ism, couldn’t endure any type of strenuous activity (including his flying trapeze act) without repeatedly shouting out “boink bang clank tinkle itch meow” in blaring falsetto.

-Gladys Potter

Dick Slurpzip took advantage of the sabbatical from his job as a fifth grade teacher and decided to change his name. He was so sick of the onomatopoeia jokes! The morning of his return he straightened his tie, looked at his reflection and said, “Not even a ten year old can make a wisecrack about Sir Pennywhistle von Noisybuns!”
Lady Schwartz

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3 Responses to Sabbatical/onomatopoeia

  1. wrightless smalls says:

    Herbert leaves soon for Argentina, he’s taking sabbatical to study onomatopoeia with naked aborigines, mostly because Smalls couldn’t fully wrap her mind around the concept.

  2. Dr Banana says:

    “Yes, I can see you, but what on Earth are you doing in my soup?”
    “Whoosh whoosh, kabonk kablam blast shhhhhhh” The tiny animal in the soup only spoke in onomatopoeia.
    Janet was hallucinating again, it was the 3rd time this month and it had been 2 months since she her sabbatical at Amazon.com. The affects should have long been over and the visions were wreaking havoc when children were around at her job as a human statue of liberty in battery park. Although she did find she was making record tips.

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