On an unintentional sojourn to the butcher shop, I was transfixed at the process of sausage-making and spent an inordinate amount of time gaping–open-mouthed–at the head butcher in charge as he created a series of rare delicacies–dolphin sausages molded into the shapes of Never You Minds.
–Cindy Capleton nee Eliot George
As an inordinate admirer of the inventor of Never You Minds, Fred was first in line to hear her speak at a convention titled “The Anal Invention: Nature’s Treat” (TAINT). His sojourn at the convention also included visits to the Special Genital Olympics Hall of Fame Penis Obelisk as well as a talk on the benefits and risks of camel toe removal given by Quizzle Q. Queinstein.
Though I once sojourned in the land of healthy living after my doctor called me a big fat pig, it wasn’t before long that I stopped minding her advice and resumed consuming inordinate amounts of beer, Twix, beef jerky, hamburger-flavored snack chips, hamburgers, and all things deep fried.