“Gesundheit!” Alice preemptively yelled as she saw Herbert’s eyes squint and chest rise, to which Herbert responded–eyes widened, chest back down to size–“How dare you, you asshole!!??!!!” for the last thing you want when an animalcule takes a joy ride up your nose is for some jerk to scare away your detoxifying sneeze.
-Gladys Potter

“Mom?” sniffled the little protozoa. “Yes, dear? I’m busy multiplying so please just spit it out.” “I think I’m sick,” said the young one. “That’s impossible! An animalcule can’t get sick! How on earth would a germ get germs?” The young amoeba then shocked everyone in the petri dish with a loud sneeze. Since this petri dish was in Germany, all the tiny bacterium turned to the lad and wished him Gesundheit, in the hopes that his microscopic soul wouldn’t fly out of his cell membrane.

~Lady Schwartz

I knew I’d been staring at my screen far too long when suddenly after a violent sneeze, an animacule climbed out of my keyboard and said in a squeeky voice, “gesundheit!”

–Cindy Capleballs

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One Response to Animalcule/gesundheit

  1. wrightless smalls says:

    Most people don’t know, but should you end up in the priveledged position of meeting the Dalai Lama, (I don’t know how I did, I felt like such frivolous animalcule in his presence!) he does not say namaste or some hippie bullshit, but instead, rests his hand that smells oddly like mango-flavored licorice on the space between your eyes and whispers “Gesundheit child, gesundheit.” like some softened german nanny who’s witnessed a child of 3 years or younger sneeze.

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