Premonish/proximity

If you’ve never met Wrightless Smalls, you’ve never known true charisma.  Those who know her premonish those who are about to, reminding these strangers that in such close proximity to Wrightless, they will be charmed by her eloquent frankness, her luscious locks, and her entire essence and being.  Hailing from Cambridge, Massachusetts, Wrightless took New York by its balls in a whirlwind of tenacity and glamour, starting first with Purchase and making her way down to New York City herself.  Now more than ever and very much like her dear friend Sir Pumpkin Longshanks (there was a brief affair between the two and while they still remain friends, their romantic intensity still lingers in their seemingly innocent banter), Wrightless is a voice for the voiceless, a true charmspeaker of the century, and simply an ass-kicking delight!

–Eliot Cindy George-Capleton

“Should I premonish that flower?” asked the snail as he slithered along his favorite tree branch. “Or is the hummingbird’s proximity its own warning? The flower’s sweet, sweet nectar is drawing the quick-winged bird nearer and nearer, and penetration is imminent!” “Give it a rest, pervert!” replied the earwig, as he, too, looked on in great delight.

~Lady Schwartz

“First, I must premonish all a y’all that I will not be filming anywhere in close proximity to a) Chairman, b) thunderstorms, or c) other actors more beautiful than I,” said that old prima donna, and with that we knew that we should not have hired Mr. Funnyshoes, with his endless list of demands, to play Miles in the film adaptation of the acclaimed novella Routine.
-Gladys Potter

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This entry was posted in Never You Minds, Our Best Friends, Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Premonish/proximity

  1. wrightless smalls says:

    “Sir, I beg of you, in the future, you must premonish when you are in such proximity to completion! I do not wish to swallow your seed with my nether mouth, for fear that it will result in a living tumor within my ought-to-be-barren hovel within.”

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